Some rookie lessons happen in practice. Some happen in film sessions. And some, apparently, happen when Vlade Divac convinces you that Lucy Liu wants to go on a date with you.
The story, retold by Divac is one of those perfect old-school locker room tales: too detailed to sound made up, too ridiculous to believe immediately, and somehow made even better by Kobe Bryant being the one to deliver the punchline.
The victim was Tony Bobbitt, an undrafted rookie guard with the Lakers during the 2004-05 season. Bobbitt was trying to find his way in a locker room that still had big personalities, even after the Shaq-Kobe era had officially ended. Divac had returned to Los Angeles for one final NBA season, Kobe was still Kobe, Lamar Odom was in the room, and the veterans apparently still had plenty of time to make a rookie’s life complicated.
According to the story, it started when Bobbitt noticed actress Lucy Liu sitting near the court at a Lakers game. Bobbitt, blocked by Divac’s giant frame on the bench, wanted a better look and thought Liu might be looking his way. That was all Divac needed. The veteran center saw the opening, leaned into the moment and turned a harmless rookie crush into a full-blown production.
The setup was beautifully cruel. A note was supposedly arranged to make Bobbitt believe Liu wanted to contact him. The number on the note was not hers. It was Vlade’s. From there, the prank grew legs. Fake calls. Fake messages. A fake romantic setup. Bobbitt, believing he was talking to a Hollywood star, started telling teammates that he and Liu were connecting. Once that happened, the locker room had no reason to stop.
That is where the story shifts from prank to documentary-level chaos. The Lakers allegedly let it breathe for days. Bobbitt thought he had something real going. The veterans watched it unfold. Cameras were reportedly involved. Champagne was prepared. A limo was arranged. The rookie was sent to what he thought would be a date with Lucy Liu.
Instead, the team was waiting.
And then came Kobe.
Bryant, who could be merciless in competitive settings and apparently just as sharp in a locker-room roast, helped break the news. In the retelling, Kobe teased Bobbitt, pushed the moment and finally let him know the truth: there was no Lucy Liu date. The whole thing had been Vlade. The messages, the setup, the dream scenario… all of it.
That is brutal. It is also incredibly funny, in the specific way NBA veteran pranks can be funny when the room is full of grown men acting like middle schoolers with per diem.
For Bobbitt, it was probably horrifying in the moment. For everyone else, it became one of the funniest Lakers stories ever told.
